“Don’t buy anything with velcro, it’s a total rip off!”
“Hedgehogs eh? Why don’t they just share the hedge?!”
“I’m not doing this stay at home thing for the good of my health you know!”
“Don’t buy a spider from the pet shop, you can get one cheaper from the web!”
“So without telling her, I swapped our bed for a trampoline, my wife hit the roof!”
“Today I built an electric fence around my house, my neighbour is dead against it!”
“I Wish I could get a job cleaning Mirrors, it’s just something I can see myself doing!”
“Russian dolls eh? They’re so full of themselves!”
I bought my friends an elephant for their room. They said “Thank you” I said ” Don’t mention it”!
“There’s no real training if you’re a bin man … you just have to pick up things as you go along!”
“I just wrote a song about a tortilla…well its more of a rap really!”
“People are making apocalypse jokes…like there’s no tomorrow!”
Love these jokes, definitly uplifting and we all need humour :))