Posted in Weekly Blog

I am worthy!

self-esteem-healthy

Today we had a smaller group but certainly no less productive.  Our discussion today was around confidence and self-worth.  We talked about how our experiences (good and bad) from childhood have shaped us adults today.  e.g While having  a romantic relationship as an adult we may tend to be with someone who reminds us of our parent even if we did not have the best of relationships with that parent.  No matter how unhappy a relationship may leave us feeling, we may decide to stay in it due to our life experiences. Was it possibly the familiarity that attracted us to this person at the start of the relationship?  Sometimes it may feel safer to stay with what you know and expect. That is why it is always helpful to become more self-aware and to find out why we do what we do, and are there any familiar patterns emerging?  It is about learning to believe in yourself and like yourself for who you are, and most importantly, to be kind and compassionate to yourself.  When feeling low on confidence we may tell ourselves;

“I’m so stupid, I’m worthless, It’s my fault, I’m a failure, I’m not good enough, I’m incompetent.”

An example of our behaviors may be;

  1. Trying to please others
  2. getting defensive when we believe we’re being criticised
  3. Being passive and shy around others
  4. Avoiding situations and people
  5. Neglecting or abusing ourselves

We then talked about the “Poisoned parrot” .  This is essentially an analogy for self-talk. Group members found this thought tool very useful in relating to some of their own experiences.

Below is The Poisoned Parrot thought tool;

self-esteem-5-638

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